Too Late
by amrgirl59
Summary: If Bella was too late to save Edward in Italy, what would have happened? One-shot. Rated M for dark themes and slight cursing.


**A/N: The idea for this just sort of popped up into my head one night. It seemed so much better before I slipped and bruised my arm and foot, but I decided to go along with it. I do have a full length story that I'm working on, but I felt like taking a break. Oh, and I did leave the ending open for alternate endings. Anyways, thanks for reading!**

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BPOV

As the clock stopped chiming, I saw him step out into the sunlight.

"Edward, no!" I shouted after him. I needed to get to him, to save him. I could never live knowing that he's gone. But it was too loud, and I was too far away. I was just a slow human. It was too late as I saw his skin sparkle. Not many heads around him turned, but a few did, and that was all that would cause his demise. I saw two cloaked figures pull him back into the shadows. The law had to be obeyed. How was I to know that the short glimpse that I had gotten of him would forever be the last?

"No! No, Edward!" I was still yelling, pushing my way through the crowd to get to him. But strong arms pulled me under the shade of a doorway.

"Bella, Bella, it's too late. They've already-" Alice paused, trying to keep in a sob. "We have to get back to Forks. There's nothing we can do."

"No, Alice, I have to go after him." I reached up to push my hair out of my face, and I realized that I was crying. "I love him. I know he may not love me back, but-"

"Bella, really, how idiotic can you be?" Alice interrupted. "He has always loved you." She smiled lightly. It wasn't like she could actually laugh in our situation.

"But he left..." I trailed off.

"He left to protect you from us. He didn't want you getting hurt again. Any one of us could have killed you. Not just when you were bleeding, but at anytime. You're human, and your heart is pumping blood through your body. You're living and breathing. All the time, you're vulnerable to us; prey. So easy to kill... But he wanted to make sure he never put you at that risk again. Edward left- and made us leave, too- because of his love. He came here, wishing for death, because he thought you had died. He didn't do it from guilt; Edward wanted to die because he simply couldn't survive in a world where you didn't exist. For whole time he's been gone, he was only able to keep moving on because of the thought that you were still alive somewhere." Alice grabbed onto my shoulders and shook me. "Don't you see? Edward could never stop loving you."

"Oh my god," I gasped. It had all been my fault. If I had tried harder, maybe I could have saved him. But now he was gone, and it was all my fault. I caused his death. The Cullens would all hate me now. I should have gone after him and tried my hardest and...

"Come on Bella, we have to get back to the car. I'll call the airport right now to book a flight home. We have to get back to Forks. They probably already know we're here, but the quicker we leave the better." Alice grabbed my arm and started leading me to wherever she had parked the Porsche she had previously stolen.

"No!" I protested. "I have to go back to save him! Or have them kill me or-" I tried to pull out of her grip but she tugged me gently in the direction we were heading.

"Bella, he wouldn't want you to die for him. He wanted you to live a normal life; that's why he left." Alice spoke softly. "He wants you to live. And I promised Jasper I would get us home. We have to go and tell them what happened. If we get ourselves killed- because there's no way in hell I'd let you go in there alone- then there'd be no way for the rest of our family to find out. And we can't leave them hanging like that. Yes, Bella," she added, "you are part of our family. We all love you, even Rose." Alice smiled, and pulled me into a quick hug before her mood darkened. "We have to leave now. We've already wasted too much time standing here. Every second we waste is another they have to come after us. They probably already know..." And with that, she continued pulling me away, towards where she had left the car.

The plane ride back to Forks was the hardest trip of my life. Leaving the last place Edward had ever been the place he died at. And I couldn't do anything about it. Alice would see if I tried anything, and she would put a stop to it.

When we arrived at the Sea-Tac airport, the rest of the Cullens were waiting for us. Alice rushed off the Jasper's side as I trudged along behind her, and he wrapped his arms around her.

"Alice, darlin', what happened?" Jasper asked her soothingly. I was standing there, awkwardly alone, when Esme gasped "no!"

"Can we go back to the house? I'll tell you everything there," Alice promised, and so she did. Once back at the Cullen's, she told them everything. I just sat there, stiffly silent, with Esme's arm around me. Hearing the story was almost as bad as being there. I had to suffer through everybody else's sobs and screams. But, then again, nothing could compare to the pain of watching his last few moments alive.

Carlisle figured that since Aro had probably read Edward's mind- Aro could read all the thoughts a person had ever had with just one touch- the Volturi would know about me. They decided that the only safe thing would be to change me into a vampire. I honestly didn't mind anymore, and since I had fought so hard for it before, it would only be fair to let them change me for their sake. We set the date for after graduation. To the human world, the Cullens would be returning to Forks, since Esme didn't find living in L.A. to her pleasure. The only change would be that Edward wouldn't be going back to school. Just Alice would go with me. Speaking of which, I had missed two days, and owed an explanation to Charlie.

When I got back home and opened the door, he pounced.

"Where the hell have you been? I've been so worried about you, Bells," Charlie exclaimed.

"Edward got into a car crash. He was driving up to visit me, and was hit coming into Washington. I had to go to the hospital to see him one last time." The bogus story shut Charlie up. "Yes, I still loved him and he loved me," I snapped. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you where I was. I rushed out to the hospital as soon as I can. I'm tired now. Can I get to sleep?" I was trying to end the conversation quickly, and get to the comfort of my room.

"Uh, yeah," Charlie nodded. "Sorry. Just don't do it again."

Sleep came easy that night, since I hadn't gotten much recently. But it was just that once. The nightmares had come back. Only this time, it was Edward dying different ways. It always had hooded figures with red eyes involved, though. These nightmares were worse than before. Each day the methods of death got more painful and slow. I would wake up in the middle of the night, screaming. It freaked Charlie out more than before.

School was hard. I ignored all of my human friends, and tried to ignore the vampire ones. The human ones knew that Edward had been killed coming back to me. That pegged us as a couple. At least I wasn't getting asked out by anybody- that much. Lauren ignored me from the time I got back, or was just a bitch to me. Jessica still acted like we were best friends for the first month after I got back. Then she finally got the hint and didn't pay any attention to me anymore. Angela, like always, was sweet. She never gave up on being my friend. And Mike, Tyler, and Eric were... themselves. They kept on trying to get with me, bringing on the jealousy of other girls. They did recognize that Edward had died, but they unfortunately never gave up.

Alice was with me most of the day. She was the only thing that kept me going. She had already lost her brother, and didn't want her sister to go anywhere. The Cullens accepted me back. Nobody hated me. Even Rosalie was nice to me. It did seem like they all treaded around me carefully, not wanting to upset me. They had all lost a son or a brother, but I had lost my mate. I didn't think the difference in relationships should matter, seeing as how they knew Edward longer, but apparently they did thought it did matter. Rosalie blamed herself profusely for what had happened. She said she never should have told Edward that I had gone cliff diving. Alice regretted telling Rose in the first place. And the rest of the Cullens found fault in letting Edward leave Forks in the first place, and letting him go to Italy later. But I was the only one to blame. I didn't get how they couldn't see it was my fault. My fault for loving him, for jumping off the damn cliff, for not being able to get to him in time. It could never be anybody else's fault besides mine.

Victoria hadn't reappeared- yet. Maybe she found out that Edward had died, and figured that his death would be enough of a revenge. Or maybe she thought the stakes were too high and she had too much of a chance of death with all six Cullens back. Or maybe, and most likely, she was just hiding away, planning something big. But with any way, she hadn't come back, and I was safe for then.

Charlie avoided talking to me; I could tell. I knew that he didn't mean anything bad by it. It was like when Edward left; I was nearly comatose. It was worse, because Edward was gone forever. I determined it was because there was always a small chance that he would come back before, but now there was none. I had no hope at all now. I didn't even have Jake to keep me going...

Jacob had ditched me, for lack of better words. Charlie made me call him once, just because Jacob had helped me to get somewhat better before. Jake exploded- not literally. I never even got to tell him Edward had been killed. He started yelling at me through the phone. He said he never wanted to speak to me or see me again. He told me he hated me for going back to the Cullens. His reasoning was because I went back to being a "leech lover," as he put it. I was now one of them, a traitorous enemy. And the fact that I was going to end up as a vampire made it worse. None of the pack would talk to me. I was all alone again, at least on that side of the boundary line.

Renée didn't find out that I had disappeared for two days until after I had gotten back. Charlie was so busy with worrying about me and the plans for Harry's funeral- which I hadn't gone to, seeing as how it would cause too much conflict with the Quileutes- that Charlie never got the chance to tell Renée. Now she knew what had happened with Edward and his death. She hadn't visited me at all, but she emailed and called every day. It got really annoying after a while, but I didn't blame her. I wouldn't want to see myself. I had given up on my appearance, just trying get through the day, the week, the month.

Quickly, graduation came and passed. Alice threw a party at their house, which I attended, along with most of the high school population of Forks. It was nice, but I sat in a corner with my soda the whole night. Alice and Rose tried to get me to wear make-up and fix my hair and wear stylish clothes, but I didn't budge. I had stopped caring.

In the fall I was set to go to Washington Community College. Alice and the rest of the Cullen "children" were going with me. They decided to buy a house closer to the campus and live there. I convinced them to let me go to one year of college before I would get changed. If I'm already living on my own, then it would be easier for Charlie when I couldn't see him anymore.

Although none of the Cullens blamed me, I still put the guilt on myself. It pressed down on me, every second. It was too much to live with. I caused Edward's death, and, for that, I could never see him alive again. I needed him. The loss was just too much to bear. The internal pain was too real, too much, and it wouldn't go away. It would be so easy. Charlie's gun, one too many pills, a razor to my wrist. But I couldn't I had to stay alive for Alice's and Charlie's sake. And Jake. He would never want me to die. He would blame himself. That, and Alice would see whatever I'd do before I actually did anything. As soon as I made the choice...

For some reason, I began driving to La Push. I didn't really know why, but I just had to see Jake.

When I arrived at his house in La Push, Billy had rolled outside to greet me. My truck was loud, after all.

"Bella, go home. You're not wanted here. He hates you. That will never change. You made the wrong choice, and you can't go back on it." Billy then spun around and went back inside his house, slamming the door behind him.

Billy telling me to leave was so much more final that Jake screaming at me on the phone. That was the last straw. I pulled my truck over to the side of the road, and broke down crying. When I finally looked up, I realized that the place I had stopped at was the cliff I had jumped from. The damn cliff that had started it all. Subconsciously, I got out of my truck, and started moving towards the cliffs edge. I had nothing to live for. My friends hated me, my family avoided me, and the one I loved was gone, forever. It was just too much. It was all suffocating me. I needed a way out, once and for all. I needed to see Edward again.

And quickly, I made up my mind.

I jumped.


End file.
